Oh, the dreaded wedding guest list – the source of countless arguments, headaches, and family drama. It’s a task that can make even the most organized couple feel like they’re spinning out of control. The process in itself may make you understand why some couples just elope and forget the guest list altogether!

So, how many people should you invite to your wedding? This is a question that is sure to spark a lively debate with your mother-in-law, especially if your answer is, “No one, we’re running away to Vegas!”

When to Decide “How Many People Should I Invite to My Wedding?”

Planning a wedding can be a stressful process, but don’t worry – we are here to help! After your engagement, one of the first items on your wedding checklist should be outlining a guest list. It is important to choose your guest list first; after all, your guests will be a major part of your special day!

It’s recommended that you finalize your guest list before hiring any wedding vendors; by knowing the number of guests you’ll have, you’ll be able to articulate your needs to potential vendors and gain accurate quotes for services.

When it comes to choosing a wedding venue, keep in mind that popular venues book up quickly, especially on highly coveted dates, such as weekends during the spring and summer. Wedding venues are like the Beyoncé of your wedding vendors – everyone wants to work with them. By determining your guest list early on, you’ll be able to secure a wedding date and venue that can accommodate all of your needs!

How to Narrow Down Wedding Guests

Do I have to Allow Plus-Ones?

Great news – it’s your wedding day, so ultimately, you can decide whether or not to offer plus-ones to your guests. You have all the freedom to say yes to everyone or no to all plus-ones. However, if you are interested in traditional wedding etiquette, here is a guide to help you navigate who should receive a plus-one invitation.

Married Guests: When addressing invitations to married guests, be sure to include their spouse’s name on the envelope. It’s considered rude to invite only one member of a married couple.
Additionally, these guests should receive a plus-one invitation to the wedding:

Members of the couple’s immediate family
Member of the wedding party
Guest who may not know many other attendees
Couples who are engaged, living together, or in a serious relationship

Do I have to invite kids to my wedding?

Short answer, no.

Long answer, it’s completely up to you and the atmosphere you want to create at your wedding. Excluding individuals under 18 from your guest list may help you save money and curate a more enjoyable experience for your guests, as it eliminates the possibility of young children disrupting the ceremony.

It has become increasingly common for weddings to be strictly adult-only. If you choose to do so, be sure to make this clear on your wedding invitation. If your wedding involves a formal dress code, serves alcohol, or takes place in the evening, it will be much easier to justify the adult-only restriction. However, if your wedding takes place in the morning or afternoon, you may receive some pushback.

Does it fit into my budget?

Ultimately, the goal of your planning is to create your dream wedding. This means you may have to make difficult decisions like cutting down the guest list to book that florist you’ve had on your vision board forever.

A wedding budget breakdown should look something like this:

40% Venue and catering
15% Photography and videography
10% Music/Entertainment
10% Flowers
10% Décor
5% Attire/Beauty
3% Transportation
3% Stationary
2% Favors and gifts
2% Cake

If your guest list is overflowing, it’s time to Marie Kondo that bad boy. Keep only the guests that spark joy in your life, and ditch the rest. You don’t have to invite that one cousin you haven’t seen in a decade just because they sent you a wedding invitation back in ‘07, we promise.

This is your special day, so don’t feel guilty about being selective. Only invite those who you’re certain will remain in your life for at least the next five years. If you’re still worried about hurting anyone’s feelings, consider throwing a casual open-house after the wedding. That way, you can keep the peace and make (almost) everyone happy.

How Many Guests Will Actually Attend?

Wedding attendance can never be perfectly estimated, however, we can predict how many guests will actually show up based on past weddings.

According to Debi Buckley, a Certified Wedding Planner from Southern California, 75-85% of wedding guests usually attend. However, this percentage varies on the size of your wedding and the location of your guests.

For smaller weddings, you can expect near-perfect attendance. But for larger weddings, the percentage of attendance drops. Buckley explains that 85% of local guests, 55% of out-of-town guests, and 35% of destination guests will attend your wedding.

Additionally, the closeness of your relationship with each guest also plays a role in their attendance. For example, close family and friends are more likely to attend than distant relatives or acquaintances.

Be sure to send your wedding invitations at least six to eight weeks before your wedding. Set an RSVP deadline two to three weeks before the wedding to receive an accurate headcount!

So, How Many People Should I Invite to My Wedding?

Remember to invite everyone you truly want to share your special day with while considering the typical 75-85% attendance rate. For reference, the average number of guests at a wedding in 2021 was 105. Don’t let the guest list stress you out, take a deep breath, and start making that list!

How Many People Should I Invite to My Wedding?